Awesome in December

Awesome in December

Awesome in December

This month has had my anxiety cranked up to 11. Between moving and pouring money into the new flat, I’ve barely had a moment to even think about Christmas. It happened almost without me knowing it. And birthday? What birthday? That was barely a thing. Whatever. Fun is for children.

I’ll share photos if the new flat soon. There are lots of things to fix to make it beautiful, but at the moment, it’s nearly livable, and that is saying something.

We did manage to get out of the house and see Rogue One. While I wouldn’t call it a masterpiece, it’s definitely a lot of fun, especially if you’re already a Star Wars fan. Have you seen it? What did you think?

I’m saving my pennies for a new fridge and cooker, but until then, there are so many things I want to cook on my questionable appliances.

These peppermint crinkle cookies look so rich and fudgy, they’d make you shudder with delight. 

I can’t remember the last time I had a good cinnamon roll. These overnight toffee cinnamon rolls need to be in my life now. 

I love spicy chicken, but I have no patience for bones. These Nashville hot chicken tenders are the chicken of my dreams. 

Poinsettia Champagne Cocktail | How to be Awesome on $20 a Day

What were your favorites this month? You loved Buffalo Chicken Pinwheels, Poinsettia Champagne Cocktails, and Chicken Parmesan. I’d have all that. Maybe we should have a party. 

I hope you had an awesome Christmas. A season of change is upon us. I’m ready. 

Be Awesome

Be Awesome

Be Awesome

More and more lately, I’ve been noticing a dichotomy developing between the life I wish I had and the life I actually lead. I want to be adventurous and interesting. I want to be thin and beautiful. I want to be endlessly compassionate and intelligent. I want to kick ass at my job and at my life every single day. I want to be a woman that my daughter will admire. I want to live for a hundred years and read every book and visit every country. I want to be perfect, and I don’t want to accept that that’s an unreasonable expectation.

In real life, I come home from work, put on my pajamas, eat leftover meatballs, watch three episodes of The Crown, eat a giant slice of cheesecake, and go to bed. I am utterly boring.

I have a very hard time acknowledging the positives in myself, and don’t you dare try to enumerate them. Seeing the positives in the world around me comes quite easily. I know all about my many many blessings. 

I know the life I want to have, but I can’t stop feeling tired and listless. I even know some of the things that I could do to get there, but then I just don’t do them. I give in to my exhaustion and indulge my urge to be boring.

Maybe I should stop punishing myself. Maybe I should change. I don’t know which one is right. 

Or maybe… Maybe I should just keep faking it. Maybe I should stop looking at other people’s online edited lives and being overwhelmed with envy. Maybe I should remind myself that there are a lot of people who are just as boring as I am most days. There might even be people who look at my edited online life and feel envy. 

I don’t have the answers. The only thing I know is that every day, I get to make choices. Everyday I can choose self-love or self-loathing. I can be easy on myself, or I can be hard on myself. I can do what I’ve always done, or I can go against my instincts and just be happy. 

Choosing happiness probably comes easy to most people, but in case it doesn’t, know that I’m right there with you. Know that you’re not the only one struggling to be okay with who you are. Know that you’re not the only one faking it. Eventually, we’ll make it, and that will truly be awesome.

Awesome in November

Awesome in November

November has been exhaustingly bipolar. I can’t beat to think about politics for another minute. As the month has worn on, I’ve only gotten more nervous. 

But then… Then we went crazy. I’m married to a very impulsive man, and it keeps things rather exciting. We bought a flat, and now all of that craziness will ensue. I may never rest again. Guys, I have to buy furniture and decorate an entire apartment. I can’t even deal.

We saw Fantastic Feasts and Where to Find them and had a lovely time. It combined magic and animal conservation, so it was truly the perfect date for my husband and me.

Let’s eat our feelings. 

I’m seriously considering forcing this Cinnamon Roll Christmas Wreath on my family at Christmas.

Rosemary and potatoes can clearly only be improved by the addition of cheese. Please give me these Buttered Rosemary Smashed Potatoes with Burrata right now.

Just call me Mrs. Chocolate and Peanut Butter. Then make me this No Bake Peanut Butter Cheesecake with Dark Chocolate Ganache. Thanks.

Your favorite recipes this month were Cranberry Glazed Turkey Meatloaf, Chocolate Kahlua Bread Pudding, and Peanut Butter Fudge. You guys are the awesomest.

I’m going to play nonstop Christmas music and pretend like I don’t have to move until the very last minute. May your days be merry and bright. 

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