Alternate title: How many times can you really watch Harry Potter? Answer: As many times as you damn well please. AKA: At least once more.
You may already be able to tell that I’m a bit delirious. I feel like my whole face is swollen from sinus pressure. My nose is red, and there’s a huge pile of cough drop wrappers on the table next to me. But you know we can’t let a little thing like a raging head cold stop us from being awesome. Here’s how we make it work.
1. Ditch work (if you can)- I know a lot of people work hourly jobs, and this isn’t an option. Or you run your own business and if you’re not producing, you’re not getting paid. But for crying out loud, if you have 40 hours of comp time saved up from all that overtime you worked last month, use some of it to take a dang nap. Your co-workers don’t want you sneezing all over them anyway. It’ll be fine. Really. Those emails can wait. Right?
2. Drag yourself to the office if there’s an awesome restaurant waiting for you at the end of the day- I always manage to get sick when I have something really fun planned, like trying out a new restaurant with co-workers. So, maybe you went home sick the day before, but you can’t very well call in sick, but still show up for dinner when your boss is going to be there. Take whatever cold medicine you can get your hands on, put on a ton of makeup, bring your box of tissues, and get through the day because there’s going to be Moscow Mules and key lime pie at the end of the day. It’ll be worth it, even if you do feel like death by the time you get home.
3. Invest in good tissues and tasty cough drops- You have a cold. You’re suffering. Spend the extra dollar and get the tissues with lotion in them. You’ll feel much better and you won’t have a nasty, scabby red nose when you go back to work. Also, go ahead and get cough drops that actually taste good since you’re probably going to need a thousand of them. I’m really enjoying Halls Breezers in Cool Berry.
4. Get yourself a tea elf- Put on your saddest, most pathetic face, and get your spouse, partner, roommate, mom, or passing stranger to be on tea making duty at any given moment. You’ll probably need a minimum of five cups a day, so make sure you stock up. Around here, if it’s not Tetley, it’s not tea.
5. Watch what makes you happy- Just go ahead and watch Harry Potter again. Who cares if you have the whole movie memorized. It’s not hurting anybody. It makes you happy. It makes you forget, if only for a moment, that your head is about to explode. Okay, I guess it doesn’t have to be Harry Potter. It could be Star Wars or James Bond or whatever else you’re in to. But seriously, it should probably be Harry Potter.
6. Take a super hot super long shower- You have my permission to waste as much energy as you want when you are congested. It may be the only place you can breathe. Just go ahead, and stay in there a little longer.
7. Blankets blankets pillows blankets and pillows- Seriously, just go ahead and build a fort. Snuggle up. Everyone else can just shut up.
Okay, so if you’re really sick, you should probably see a doctor, but for now, curl up, drink tea, get your own trash bag next to your side of the couch, and wait it out in as much comfort and style as you can. It’ll be over soon. In the meantime, don’t forget to be awesome.