Writing a blog post when I’m exhausted out of my mind is always a bad idea. Words? What are those? Do I know how to make sentences? Am I even human? What’s happening? One thing I know for sure is that time never stops and while hard work won’t get you everything it will get you a whole lot further than laziness.
When I was a kid, we always left cookies and milk out for Santa on Christmas Eve. If we were especially on the ball, they were monstrously decorated sugar cookies that my brother and I loaded up with way too much candy. I was never ever good at art. I always just naively assumed that everyone left cookies and milk for Santa. Not so.
Apparently, in England, they leave pork pies out for Father Christmas to snack on. He can apparently also get cookies if he’s lucky, and in at least one house in Lancashire, he could stop off for a shot of rum. It’s a stressful night, I guess. A bit of booze may be exactly what he needs.
I also learned that you can buy pork pies from a vending machine in England, which kind of freaked me out. Room temperature meat? Turns out those machines are refrigerated. Not to worry. Still, I think we can do a bit better.
Making your own pork pies is actually quite simple, especially if you’re lazy, like me, and you use store-bought pie crust. Just mix together some finely chopped onion and ground pork, along with a few seasonings. Nestle it down into some pie crust, give it a lid, paint on some egg wash, and pop it in the oven.
These are a great little snack for a party. Easy to eat with your hands and finish in two to three bites. No need for a knife and fork, so you can keep holding your drink in the other hand. I imagine that’s how the English would do it.
If you can’t get your favorite treats from back home, there’s a pretty good chance you can make them yourself. Mini pork pies are an awesome place to start.
- 1/2 onion, peeled and roughly chopped
- 1 pound ground pork
- 1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg
- 1/2 teaspoon mustard powder
- 1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce
- 2 sheet refrigerated pie crust or your favorite recipe
- 1 egg, beaten
- Pop your half onion into a food processor and give it a spin until you have small bits. Add the ground pork to the processor and pulse 4-5 times. Add the seasonings to the meat and pulse a few more times to combine. Refrigerate if you're not going to use it right away.
- Preheat your oven to 350 and lightly spray a muffin pan with nonstick spray.
- Roll out your pie dough on a lightly floured surface. You'll want to be careful with your dough because you'll just barely have enough. Start by thinning out the dough just a bit.
- Cut 12 11-centimeter circles from your pie dough and 12 8-centimeter circles. You'll have to re-roll the scraps several times, but you can just make it.
- Use your large circles to create the base of your pie by pressing it gently into the cups of your muffin pan. Fill each pie with about two tablespoons of the meat mixture. Place a small circle on top of each pie and gently pinch the top and bottom together.
- Brush the top of each pie lightly with the beaten egg, and use a sharp knife to cut an X shaped vent into the top of each pie.
- Bake your pies for about 40 minutes or until your pie crust is golden brown. Allow the pies to cool for several minutes in the pan, then gently lift them out to cool completely. Pies can be eaten warm or cold, preferably with a drink in hand.
